Question: Can laypeople give blessings? This is going on in my parish in prayer groups and sometimes at Mass where the priest asks everyone to join him by extending their hands to bless someone. Also, people extend their hands like the priest during the Our Father.
— Janice Janecoveck, Chicago
Answer: In the liturgical setting, only a priest (and sometimes the deacon) should be conferring blessings since they are present and available for such. This is also the case where some laypeople who are distributing Communion give blessings if a person asks for it instead of holy Communion. Since it is awkward to refuse to give a blessing, I have often advised the laity to just say, “God bless you,” but to make no sign of the cross or any priestly gesture. The general practice of even priests and deacons giving blessings in the Communion line is frowned upon by liturgists, but it is widespread and difficult to fully eliminate, and this is why the laity are sometimes observed giving “blessings.”
When a blessing, say for a birthday or Mother’s Day, is being given by a priest at the announcement time, he should not ask the laity to extend their hands or explicitly join him in conferring the blessing. This confuses the distinct role of the clergy and the uniqueness of the priestly blessing. Perhaps he can invite them to bow their heads and pray along, but the blessing is conferred by the priest, and this should be clear in the action.
Outside of the liturgy, laypeople can give certain blessings in certain ways. For example, a parent can bless a child, an elder can bless a youngster, etc. In doing this, however, they ought to avoid priestly gestures such as making the sign of the cross over others. Perhaps tracing the cross on the forehead is enough, or simply laying a hand on the head, or no gesture at all, are better.
In settings where laypeople are praying for one another, such as in a prayer group or setting for healing or deliverance, similar rules should be followed: avoiding overtly priestly gestures, being content to lay hands, or making no gesture at all.
In the rare instances where laypeople lead formal liturgical gatherings, such as the Liturgy of the Hours, they must not only avoid gestures, but also follow prescribed texts that merely ask God’s blessing on the assembled believers but do not imply they are bestowing such blessings.
As for extending hands like the priest during the Our Father, there is no instruction on the posture of the laity in the Roman Missal at this prayer. However, it seems a similar norm should apply — namely, overtly priestly gestures should be avoided. Perhaps the pious custom of some to lift their hands palms upward is fine, but arms should not be extended outward like the priest. But recall, there is no firm rule on this, and so some degree of freedom is permitted. Any lack of mutual charity should be avoided.
Jesus goes missing?
Question: When Jesus was lost and later found in the Temple, I wonder why Joseph and Mary would not have kept watch over him and went a whole day before they knew he was missing. Please explain.
— Name withheld, via email
Answer: Two factors need to be kept in mind to understand the loss of Jesus. At age 12, Jesus would have been considered almost an adult in that culture at that time. Perhaps it would be like a 17-year-old in our culture. It does not pertain that parents must keep as close a watch on a much older child as with a very young child. Second, pilgrims making the journey from Galilee to Jerusalem and back, a walk of over 70 miles, often walked in fairly large groups. It was common for people to divide out, women walking with women, men with men. Older children might also walk together; the younger children would stay with their mothers.
As an older child reaching adulthood, it is easy to understand how Jesus might have walked with a group apart from his parents. And this would go unnoticed until the evening when families would reunite. Immediately upon noticing Jesus’ absence and inquiring among other relatives, they rushed back to Jerusalem to find him.
With these two factors in mind, they were not negligent. The temporary separation from him was understandable, and immediately upon noticing it, they saw him out.
Msgr. Charles Pope is the pastor of Holy Comforter-St. Cyprian in Washington, D.C., and writes for the Archdiocese of Washington, D.C. at blog.adw.org. Send questions to msgrpope@osv.com.
